Cat, Witch, or Police Officer

Nisheeka Simmons, Staff Writer

It is that time of year again: children are begging their parents to buy them random outfits, candy prices are ridiculous, and pumpkin spice flavored everything. Halloween is right around the corner, and though stores are already displaying Christmas trees, the big decision everyone is trying to make right now is what to wear on the last night of the month. While guys can just wear all black, throw on a mask and call it a night, the ladies have it a bit tougher.

Anyone who has ever watched Mean Girls (starring the once fabulous Lindsey Lohan) knows that the ever illustrious Halloween party is the highlight event of October socialites. It was this movie that introduced me to the fact that a lot of young adult females use the night as an opportunity to wear, well, rather promiscuous attire. I had no personal experience with this until around this time last year when I witnessed it through one of the events that Francis Marion University holds every year around this time. There were young ladies in attendance in various stages of undress. What surprised me the most was that even some of the quietest, sweetest girls I know were among the ranks.

The original class of Halloween costumes for women has devolved significantly. What used to be an evening for witches and brides of Frankenstein has morphed into a night out for scantily clad animals and “sexy” versions of civil service employees. I do not find it at all original. In fact, I find it ridiculous. If any of these modesty-impaired ladies so happen to do a walk of shame the next morning, I’m pretty sure that their neighbors will agree with me. Even so, my main issue with this less than flattering “tradition” is how it affects those of us who do not conform to the expectations.

There is a significant number of females who actually prefer to keep things a little secretive. This pretty much means, as one of my nursing professors so eloquently put it, “no cracks, top or bottom.”  Well, those guidelines are all fine and dandy until you try to find a costume at a commercial outlet. There will be cracks, whether top, bottom, or both. Those who are either easily influenced or desperate will usually settle for either. Then they end up adjusting their outfit and feeling rather uncomfortable all night long.

The simple fix, you would think, is to make your own costume, but even this is can be a daunting task. It involves a process of weeding out costumes that you are definitely not qualified to create, buying the materials, actually taking the time to put it all together, and praying that it comes out the way that you imagined it.  Been there, done that.  The point I’m trygin to make is that if stores would sell costumes that we can wear without feeling trashy, that would be great.  Hey, a girl can dream, right?