I’m in a long-distance relationship, and my significant other and I are pretty bad about taking pictures. The camera on my phone is awful, and he doesn’t particularly enjoy being in photos. In my opinion, we are a rather photogenic couple. Each time we visit each other, I usually only walk away with two pictures, which is being generous.

Then all over Facebook, Twitter, Snapchat and Instagram, people started saying “Pics or it didn’t happen.” I have a bit of a problem with that idea – there are some things I don’t want pictures of.

I enjoy going out and having a great time with my friends, and every once in a while, someone will have too much fun and be in an embarrassing situation (read: puke). I don’t want pictures of those moments for my keeping or for the unfortunate person’s keeping. That’s not fun, and that can be a pretty incriminating picture if someone is looking for a job and an employer sees that.

A couple of people on my Snapchat post pictures of their friends who partied too hard, and, to be completely honest, I’m more likely to think negatively about the person who posted the photo rather than the person who is sick. While taking that photo can be a tiny bit amusing, after the fact, you look like a really bad friend. You’re putting another person’s embarrassing photos or, god forbid, videos, on social media for people who don’t even know them to see.

I don’t see how that makes a person a good friend. If one of my friends parties too hard, I get some Pepto Bismol and Pedialyte, and I help them lie down. It’s not kind, loving or supportive to take pictures and videos of friends who’ve passed out and post them on social media. In my opinion, it’s pretty lowbrow and even a little bit pathetic.

To make matters worse, the person who got sick usually endures some good, old-fashioned ragging. But when it goes online, you can’t control who sees it.

I can easily think of three people who frequently post embarrassing stuff of others on Snapchat, and that just makes the situation worse. If I ever meet those people who I’ve seen pictures of, I already know something pretty embarrassing about them that they would probably not have shared with me.

Long story short – I don’t want to see it.

“Pics or it didn’t happen” is just an excuse to make yourself seem like you’re cool because you’re partying hard and having fun. I don’t think it works that way.

If you want to post on social media when you’re partying, which previous experience compels me to urge you against, post a selfie. Post a group picture. Post an over-filtered picture of your drink (if you’re over 21). Post one of those cute Polaroid pictures since those are coming back. Post your outfit that makes you look like a boss.

Don’t post the picture of your friend passed out on the ground. Don’t post the picture of your friend’s head over a toilet bowl. Don’t post the picture of your friend nodding to sleep in the club because they’ve had too much to drink and can’t stay awake.

You become a bad friend when you don’t think about the wellbeing of your friend, whether you’re partying or not. In short, don’t be a jerk. Don’t post embarrassing pictures on Snapchat. Be a good friend and help your buddy lie down with a trashcan instead of going to social media.